A crisis in family relationships is simply inevitable. However, there are couples who do not withstand such crisis checks, while others easily overcome life difficulties, looking at them with a smile. What mistakes some make, and what is the secret of family happiness and the well-being of others - it is not difficult to figure out.
Instructions
Step 1
Form common life goals and family values
Shared goals are incredibly unifying and motivating to move forward. You don't have to think too globally. Discuss with your partner what values he has, voice yours and identify those that unite you. For example, you both want and are ready to have children or build a country house, take a dog, after all. Make these small guiding stars for your marriage to help you move towards common goals.
Step 2
Find yourself and learn to be happy
No matter how easy it is to blame your partner for all your troubles, always start with yourself. Only you yourself can make yourself happy or unhappy, healthy or sick. Your partner can only help you get through difficult times mentally, but not do something for you. You yourself are responsible for your happiness, mood, attitude to the world around you, health. Take care of yourself, find a state in which you will be comfortable, finally love yourself. When you energize yourself, you will have something to give to others.
Step 3
Forget old grudges
The life of most unfortunate people is unhappy only because they are not ready to forgive and cannot forget old grievances. It's time to get rid of them, because this is exactly what destroys you from the inside, erasing all the good that is in your relationship. Remembering old grievances, you continue to analyze them endlessly, finding a lot of new reasons to make a scandal out of the blue. Stop and think. If you want to live happily, forget everything that is long gone in the past.
Step 4
Learn to talk about your feelings
Emerging scandals are better prevented than taken to extremes. Also, your partner is not a telepathic person. Perhaps he did not even think that some of his words or actions could offend you. Just don't chop off the shoulder, calm down first, and then share your feelings and experiences with your partner. Discuss how you can avoid repeating the situation and what steps you should take to meet each other.
Step 5
Never stop showing affection for each other.
The problem for many couples is that their past feelings and emotions for a partner simply faded away, although deep down they still hope to receive these feelings in return. Do not wait for the initiative, show it yourself. Remember the euphoria and incredible love that you experienced when you first met. Be nice to your partner, be gentle, compliment. Even if he does not yet reciprocate you, sooner or later he will respond with tenderness to tenderness and will do you something pleasant in return.
Step 6
Learn to understand not only yourself, but also your partner
As a rule, we always put our emotions and experiences above others. However, try to understand your partner's feelings. Put yourself in his place, see why he could have acted this way in a given situation; what emotions your words could cause in him, etc. Even if you do not go deep into feelings, pay attention to his hobbies, preferences in food and sex, desires and aspirations. The better you know your partner, the better you will learn to understand him.
Step 7
Have sex more often
Do not underestimate the role of quality and consistent sex in family life. This tool is one of the most powerful in strengthening family ties. Find out about your partner's sexual preferences and remember to please each other. Any quarrels come to naught with partners who do not have problems with their sex life.
Step 8
Don't try to change anyone but yourself
Changing another person is a thankless and useless occupation. Learn to perceive your partner as he is. Remember those character traits for which you fell in love with your other half, and continue to love the beauty that is in your relationship. If your partner wants to change - he will do it of his own free will, if not - do not dwell on the bad, mark only the good.
Step 9
Do not put material goods "at the forefront"
Prosperity and a good financial situation are good, but money is far from the most important thing in family life. Try not to reproach your partner with the fact that his income does not meet your expectations. If the issue is really urgent, try to discuss how you both can work together to fix this situation.
Step 10
Leave your bad mood at the door
Do not pour out your negative emotions, related to, for example, work or other areas of life, either on your partner or on your children. In the end, they are not at all to blame for what is happening. As a last resort, you can share your experiences with loved ones, but not involve them in your problems, making you "scapegoats."
Step 11
Do not deny your partner a personal space
There is no sincere love and harmonious relationships sitting in a "golden cage". Your partner is a free person, even though you are married. Therefore, do not try to limit the freedom of your partner, let him have his own personal space and his hobbies.
Step 12
Always be honest and open
It can seem difficult to always tell the truth and be an open book for your partner. However, a strong marital relationship is built solely on trust, mutual understanding, honesty and openness to each other. You can have secrets from anyone, but not from your other half.
